After Bruce’s death, Letha couldn’t sense her father anywhere—not in the faces of her nieces and nephews, not in moments of great happiness. “Why can’t I get a sense of you? Where are you?” Letha’s siblings all insisted that they felt Bruce’s presence in different ways, but for Letha, he was just gone. When she would fall asleep, she would always hope to see him…
Song name: Dreaming
Written by: Barry Craig, 2009
Performances on this recording: Barry, Jun, and Jeremy
Last updated: Added Jun’s guitars August 2018. Mixed in Jeremy’s drums and some new edits September 2014. New verse guitars and lyrics, March 2012.
I’m letting it sink in slowly, swirling the taste inside my mouth. Let it out. It’s not like I came here wanting. Pit of my stomach tumbles tumbles down. Down. Down. Down. Down. Wouldn’t you like to see it through? Feel it again my son. I love. I love. I love. You need to get past this feeling, fall on your knees on solid ground. And sometimes I realize I’ve grown so dependent on your warmth. If I just could just speak to you, you’d know you saved me. You saved me. Until… no cheerleader, no confidant, no pride. Just the sounds of emptiness inside. But when you were in my life, I never needed anything. Anything. Let me dream. Let me dream. These days, I’m afraid to feel this. Siphon the pain and let it out. You’ve go to keep it moving, now that your team is down to one. That’s when I realize. Seems I’m dependent on your smile. And if I dream of you, I’d know that you’re smiling. You’re smiling, but no… no cheerleader, no confidant, no pride. Just the sounds of emptiness inside. But when you were in my life, I never wanted anything. Anything. Let me dream. Let me dream.
Insights and Interpretations:
I have lost my best friend and I didn’t realize how that would eat at me after he was gone. I used to be a badass. Now I’m an insecure mess. Years later, I am still not “over it”. I hope this song is relatable to anyone experiencing a loss, especially if that loss had a lot of love anchored to it.